Wednesday, April 23, 2014

The Hallway

Life is so weird sometimes.  In the blink of an eye everything can just change.  I've been in the change before, or the "hallway".  I hate it and it's never comfortable, but such is life.  I've documented on this here blog countless breakups with the boy.  Just shy of 4 years together, at least 4 breakups and a million memories, we decided to call it quits.  I ugly cried, he (surprisingly) didn't.  It's been just less than a month, and for a few days in a row I'm feeling better.  Last week?  Ugh, last week was PAINFUL.  And social media never helps. And tears and unanswered phone calls don't help either (oops).  But, we both know this is it, we knew for a while that it wasn't working, that I wanted to get married, that he didn't, ect, ect. So just like that, we ended it.  I'm sure we will run into each other and say the casual hello, but I think we both know that that hello can't turn back into us being together (again).  We just don't work, even though I wish we did. 

So...

Today, I am working on myself, reading, writing, going back to therapy.  I even hit up a few al-anon meetings (best program ever, seriously).  I'm not shy about 12 step programs, I have 10 years success, they work.  I'm running, crossfitting, going out with my gals.  This new life doesn't have to suck.  I'm determined to NOT let it suck! I've wasted too much time being unhappy with the wrong person, time to find the right one.

I'm also losing weight. I've given up the wheat for good (also documented here countless attempts to get with it regarding my food),  It's been 30 days and I feel amazing.  Down 8 pounds and a bunch of inches.

I have no clue what the future holds, but I will make it a good one! 

And before I forget...Nike women's half this weekend! I'm excited to run (even though I'm not really trained) and have fun!